Breast Cancer Awareness Month and the Caregiver

Sometimes life takes an interesting turn of fate. For this supplier of caregiving products the twist comes in the fact that I am sitting in a room with my wife getting chemotherapy for breast cancer on the first day of Breast Cancer Awareness Month 2014. Here’s a brief synopsis of her story and the life journey we are taking.

My wife is a healthy and active 48 year old women. 7 Years ago she was diagnosed with Ductal Carcinoman in Situ (DCIS). She had a lumpectomy in the breast and follow up radiation. She recovered and we moved on with our normal lives under the care and supervision of doctors. Fast forward 7 years later and her doctor noticed lots of little things that were new in her annual mammogram taken late in May 2014. Not good, but not necessarily bad at this point because nothing was clearly seen, understood or defined yet. 

This started a series of tests and agonizing waits for results including an MRI and biopsies. Unfortunately there were cancer cells and after review with doctors it was determined that a mastectomy on one side would be the best course of action. This leads us to the genetic DNA testing to see if she carried the BRCA1 and/or BRCA2 genes which indicate a high propensity for cancer in the other breast or ovaries in the future. If positive results come back on this test it would be prudent to have a double mastectomy. Luckily for her these tests results came back negative and she did not have a higher risk for there cancers as indicated by these results.

With this information in hand we consulted with the doctors and scheduled her surgery in mid July 2014. The surgery would remove one breast, remove a couple of sentinel lymph nodes for testing and get the reconstructive plastic surgery started by having a spacer implant installed. The lymph nodes are sent for testing to see if there are any cancer cells in them indicating any spread of cancer. They also sent the tumor off for Oncotype DX testing to determine how effective chemotherapy would be in helping to sterilize the blood of any cancer cells that might be hiding out in the blood stream. 

Luckily the lymph nodes came back cancer free. The tumor was larger than could be seen on the MRI and mammogram so the Oncotype testing became an important part of the test to determine if chemo was needed. These test results indicated that chemotherapy would increase her 10 year survivability rate by an additional 7-8%, which in medical survivability is substantial.

So the end result of her journey was a mastectomy followed by 4 sessions of chemotherapy. Radiation was not included in her treatment as it was determined to not increase survivability and or reduce spread of the cancer. 

As a caregiver, supporter and partner in this breast cancer journey I have learned more than I ever wanted to learn. Here are some of these highlights:

• There are lots of tests with agonizing waits for results
• Every test that comes back, good or bad, leads to more tests or treatment plans
• Everyone is different so one person may have a completely different treatment plan than another
• Cancer is physically, mentally and emotionally draining for the survivor and the caregiver
• Try not to do random research on the internet - always contact your doctor(s) for information and guidance 
• Remember to be patient with the survivor. This is a roller coaster ride of emotions and thoughts
• A woman losing her hair is emotionally damaging and one of the most feared and apprehensive parts of the process. Remember to tell her she is beautiful!
• Be as prepared as you can to help the survivor in advance so that you are not scrambling around for products to help care for the survivor or make them comfortable

Here are some items that we found very helpful on our journey:

• A comfortable reclining chair 
• A bed rest booster for use to sit up in bed
• Lots of pillows in various sizes to prop up and support all kinds of body parts
• Rinse-free skin and hair cleaners (we found Aloe Vesta Bathing Cloths to be awesome)
• Skin moisturizing creams and lotions. Chemo does a number on skin (we found Sween 24 Moisturizing Cream to be a household favorite)
• Cold packs to place on hot spots during heat flashes. We use reusable cold packs that can be placed on forehead, under neck and on feet during hot flash episodes
• Medical grade room deodorizer with limited scent or unscented to cover up nasty chemo induced bathroom smells. We found ByeBye Odor to work well and not overpower the room with fragrance 
• Hand Sanitizers to help avoid spreading germs - we have pump bottles in the house and even have one right by the front door so folks that stop by to visit can sanitize their hands on the way in. 

Any item(s) that we use have been cleared with our doctors to ensure we were not causing any complications. We learned that when in doubt, call a doctor. They are more than happy to take calls (even those at 2 am and the pain seems to be escalating and fear growing). We have been blessed with an awesome team of compassionate doctors that have been so incredibly helpful. We can only hope that anyone going through this has the level of fantastic care.

Our journey continued on as she fights the good fight. Her prognosis is good and we know that there are many women having a much more difficult time and will have longer treatments. She is fighting the fight, but I am right there by her side with hugs, glasses of water, back massages or whatever she needs. My caregiver job has quickly become the ability to anticipate what she may need in advance or react quickly when she needs something. 

I love my wife and hate to see her going through this process. I am so proud of her for her spirit, courage and strength. Mostly I love her newly adopted slogan - Fight Like a Girl. So to all of you who may be going through this in your life I wish you the very best and alway remember to Fight Like a Girl!